The struggles we've overcome: Balancing each other.

Mochi's version.
We've all heard of how opposites attract. Through our premarital counseling, I've come to understand that this opposition is necessary because your partner provides for you what you are lacking. Together you are more than what you can be on your own. Most of the differences Yubo and I have drive me nuts. They're the things that annoy me the most because they're so different from me. But at the same time, I recognize how he balances me out. We would work much better together if we could just open up to each other's ways and allow ourselves to be balanced.

In the book that we're using for our premarital counseling -- "Preparing for Marriage" by Boehi, Nelson, Schulte, Shadrach, and Rainey (all men, awkwardly enough) -- there's a chart in the "Evaluating Your Relationship" section. You rank yourself, and then your partner, according to these qualities and traits listed. Then you compare your markings with each other.

Our answers were pretty similar. In nearly all of the qualities/traits, we were opposite.

The book asks, "How have you seen your differences benefit your relationship?"

I answered, "We give each other different perspectives -- a brand new way of looking at something that broadens our minds." Because we're different, and have different values and backgrounds, he will see things in a whole other way than I would. I keeps me from being too narrowminded about things.

The book asks, "What differences have caused friction and conflict in your relationship?"

I answered, "The conflict really comes when I forget that it's ok for him to be different." Because all of our differences have the potential to become conflict.

I finally got him to take his Myers-Briggs test. I am an ISFJ (Introvert, Sensing, Feeling, Judging), and he is an INFP (Introvert, iNtuitive, Feeling, Perceiving).

I'm a more extreme introvert than he is. He doesn't feel so drained by social situations, which helps me be more social that I normally would be on my own.

My sensing means that I prefer information that is more tangible and concrete. I like details and facts. Actually, I will rarely make a decision unless I have all the information I can possibly get. When I have the energy for it, I'll do a lot of research. And I like thinking of things in the here and now.
His intuition means that he can trust information that is abstract and theoretical. He likes thinking of things as they can be in the future.
The way we balance each other here is I can keep him grounded, and help him achieve his grand ideas of the future by tackling issues in the present. If he has an amazing idea, I help him figure out if it's even possible in reality.

We're both feelers, though he's more than I am. That means that when we come across a decision to be made, we're more subjective than objective in our approach. I am slightly more capable of detaching myself from a situation to take an objective look at it. This is where my dad tells me that I think about things a lot. This is also where I say I think about things too much. Because I lean more towards Feeling than Thinking, my feeling gets in the way of my thinking. =P
So Yubo and I are pretty much bleeding hearts, but we have sense enough to not bleed everywhere possible. We both would rather feed a bum than give him money. Stuff like that.

The last one is where Yubo and I probably butt heads the most. Judgers like to have matters settled while Perceivers like to keep their options open. I think this reflects how I like having a schedule and trying to stick to it where he's a go-with-the-flow, fly-by-the-seat-of-his-pants kind of guy.
As far as balancing each other here: I help him get things done. He helps me relax a little bit.

We went through a little section about spiritual compatibility as well, where I said that we're not very spiritually compatible. This is because I feel I'm more open and straightforward about my spirituality. He won't talk about it unless he has good reason to.

Being a new Christian, and being the kind of person that I am, I'm very eager to learn as much as I can about Christianity (and other beliefs and religions too). I love reading, listening, and watching anything that has to do with the history of it, conspiracies, books that aren't part of the Canon. I'm trying to get as much knowledge as I can about what the Bible is all about, what it's really saying, how it applies to today. I am amazed (and almost appalled) that so many Christians have never read the entire Bible. It's the word of God. It's our weapon against the darkness. I figure, if you believe in God, why wouldn't you read every single word He had written down for us?
Yubo's been calling himself a Christian since 8 years old. He went to Sunday school, learned all the stories, knows most of the answers. Most because he wasn't able to answer a lot of the questions I had. (He's also never read the Bible entirely, and doesn't seem to have much desire to.)
However, Yubo says that my hunger for the Lord is quite contagious and has drawn him in. Because I'm constantly seeking more, I'm kinda dragging him along with me (without really intending to). Sometimes when I find something new, it reminds him of something he already knew. And sometimes I find something that he hasn't heard before. The hard questions that I ask make him think. (Unfortunately, I'm still waiting on answers for quite a few questions.)

Even if we didn't take these test thingies, it's still really important to understand these things about each other. It all kind of just confirms speculations. We know that these tests aren't absolute, but they do help to provide a greater understanding. We're not scores or definitions or exact types. We're people with different ways of thinking about the world and interacting with the world, with different backgrounds and expectations and needs. But sometimes it helps to have a generality as a guide. We're too complex. Need something a little more simple to understand. So using these simple generalities, we can more effeciently and effectively find ways to work together. Of course, that's all "saying". We need to get to the "doing."

Yubo's version.
He keeps telling me it's gonna happen. Figured out the whole blogging from his iPhone. Doesn't look like he can edit a previous post that way though. Anyway, I'll keep encouraging him. I really want you guys to get his side of things instead of just mine.