Yubo and I had one of our many long talks that never seem to resolve anything. I've been sleeping at home again for a bit until school starts next week, so our same problems came up again. I've asked him for more quality time instead of immediately getting so absorbed into a game or
tv shows that he ignores me. He asked me to help out more around the house so that he doesn't feel overwhelmed by chores.
Since that talk, I started doing little bits like making sure the sink was clear and throwing away the trash that we would both leave in the living room.
Yesterday morning I was very frustrated with him. The problem of him staying up too late when he has to be up really early arose again. For nearly 3 or 4 days in a row, he woke up very late for work. That's what led up to this level of frustration. He set his alarm very early for something but didn't actually get out of bed. I asked him why he set it so early if he didn't really have to be up that early, and he said he was being ambitious. As he fell back asleep, I said that his being ambitious without following through was
distrupting sleep for both of us. Reason I pointed that out was because in our talk, I told him that he was probably so tired because he deprives himself of so much sleep.
So then I told him that I was going to stay awake until he actually got out of bed. He said I didn't have to, but I told him that I really didn't trust him to wake up again. I sat up and spent some quality time with
Tifa (I think she was really happy about that ^_^). Nearly an hour later he partially woke up, saw that I was still sitting up, and got out of bed in a huff. Left the house without a word.
I was irritated by his exit, even though I understood that he can be ill-tempered in the morning. That really stressed me out, so I called in to work. Because I was so irritated, I spent the whole day cleaning and reorganizing what I could. We had my new desk still in its box in the entryway (we have to figure out what to do with my old desk), so I shoved that into the bedroom and put it against the wall where it wouldn't be in the way. I continued to clear out the entryway by putting away the shoes we don't wear very often and vacuuming.
Since I had the vacuum, I did the portion of the carpet around the area that I could reach. That included finally cleaning up some of Tifa's hairballs.
After that, I went into the kitchen because that's usually the easiest place for me to clean. By the time Yubo got home I had emptied out the dish washer, swept and mopped the floor (with our new Swiffer thingie), threw away tons of things that needed to be gone finally, took out two bags of trash and started on a third, cleared off the kitchen floor of all the bags of groceries that we get but don't really put away, cleared off a lot of counterspace and reorganized where things go so that we can continue to have some counterspace to work with.
It was a very fulfilling project. I felt better by the time I had to face Yubo again. I don't think he knew at all that I was so mad that day. He had worship rehearsal last night so I also prepared his binder -- he's been subbing often enough that we're trying to cut back on the paper we use to print out the lead sheets, so I came up with printing one copy and putting it in a sheet protector and then making notes with a dry erase marker.
Since I spent so much time just cleaning in the house, I thought I should get out. Went with Yubo to worship rehearsal. Got Burger King on the way cuz we were both very hungry. And ended with a better night. When we got home, he helped me with a monologue that I'm doing for church this Sunday. Then he lounged on the couch while I finished up a little more cleaning. That third bag of trash that I started is already full up, but we have to wait until Tuesday because I already filled all the outside trashcans -- so angry that we don't have a freakin' dumpster for trash. Those cans outside only hold two bags. Thankfully, one of our neighbors moved out so there's an extra can for the rest of us to use. I still really want to just rent a dumpster and finally be rid of all the random junk we have in this place. Sometimes I think if Yubo really wanted a clean house, all he'd have to do is keep me angry because I clean when I'm upset. LoL.
Anyway... yesterday felt like we were actually fulfilling our roles -- felt like what I expect it to be like after we get married. Him at work and me at home cleaning. I'm sure that won't last long, but he agreed that we should come up with a chores list. I think that will help both of us know if one or the other might be doing more around the house, and we can easily fix it. I also want to sit down and figure out the household budget, and establish some house rules. We're adults now, so I think we can't just wing it like he's used to. Hopefully more of this stuff can get ironed out before we get married.
